unwired and paying attention
'You can be Henry Miller and I'll be Anais Nin' - Jewel, Morning SongM is Zimbabwean and lived in Cologne, married to a German guy, R. We met five years ago on a flight from London to Harare, each alone with our two boys, her youngest the same age as my oldest and my youngest four weeks old and clamped to my breast for the twelve hour flight. We had the same layover in London Heathrow and got talking, as you do, when one of you has a baby clamped to your breast and one child running amok and the other of you has two children running amok.
A few months later she and R and their two boys were in Amsterdam en route to somewhere else and we stopped at the airport to see them. Then we lost touch. They had email, but she's a midwife and he's an academic and they're those kind of people that the wired world just passes by without comment. I tried to phone a few months ago and got someone else on the line, non-English speaking and so I just assumed that M & R had disappeared.
So you can imagine my surprise when I got a card at Christmas time from them and they're in Tanzania! Who knew? They're in the foothills of Kilimanjaro, their children play barefoot in the dirt and speak fluent English as well as German and they're happy being in the African sunshine. I am looking forward to catching up.
The meeting on the plane-talking-spending time together-meeting again-writing to each other-etc thing made me think though.
You pass so many people by every day. You interact with some, ignore some, like some, dislike others, and then just one interaction with somebody and it sticks, and you think 'wow, I really like this person.'
It all depends on time and place and the choices. I guess it's really all about the choices. You look at another person and immediately make a yes or no choice, consciously or subconsciously.
Yes, I will open up to this person or no, I will not.
Everything hinges on that choice.
What I wonder about though is how often we block out what could be some meaningful interaction because we're deafened by the ipod, distracted by the tv or deep in a book or just numb from life.
How much are we really paying attention to who's around us?
Sometimes we are paying attention and then when we do there's serendipity.
Like with me and M.
I think you are right: ppl can be fascinating. On the other hand most people are very boring. Just try and ask some ppl you have just met what they do for fun. Most of them seem to get a blank stare and after some really deep thinking (ouch!!) they tell you they like to shop....
Vertine: oh god yes! I've met some of those. I can think of a whole lot of other things I'd like to do for fun.
I am the worst at keeping up with my friends lives. Thank God for MySpace... I hate it, yet it brings me up to speed with most of my friends.
BTW, Love, love LOVE the Morning Song by Jewel!
I used to be a very closed person and would never talk to that many people I did not know. Now that I have become a more open person I have realized everything I missed.
Stu: there are huge advantages to being outgoing! Look at you and your improv!
Bryna, Facebook! Where are you? :) Jewel is cool...thanks for commenting! I still have more questions for you - today I hope, then the interview can go up.